Mine hit me with the “We’re spending all this money on you now so you can’t grow up and say we didn’t spend money on you when your were a kid.”

  • 6nk06@sh.itjust.works
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    8 months ago

    I found out my parent’s computer had a lot viruses because they are dumb and bought a McAffee subscription. I told them, they answered that they knew better than me, I replied that I had a degree in computer sciences, and my father laughed like the fucking idiot he is.

    Let’s say we don’t talk about my job or computer anymore. Also I reduced the visits and phone calls that they had because I’m tired with their bullshit.

    • zarniwoop@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      8 months ago

      Been there. Told my genius step-father that his hand-me-down rig (from me) was showing signs of being on its last legs and he didn’t believe me.

      Fast forward: it dies.

      How do you think he reacted? Yeah.

      I looked at him dead in the eyes and said, “if only someone with a lifetimes experience had warned you…” and walked away.

      Not my problem. Made him buy a new one.

  • Ep1cFac3pa1m@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    I’m American: my dad told me a couple years ago that immigrants were “unclean.” I’m almost 40, and that was the first time he’d ever used that phrase. That’s probably the first time I realized how “mainstream” extremism had become, since he has virtually zero online presence.

  • SharkEatingBreakfast@sopuli.xyz
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    8 months ago

    My da told me “God does not forgive people who curse his name.”

    I asked “But God forgives people who sexually abuse kids?”

    “If they ask for forgiveness, yes.”

    wHy DoNt YoU aTtEnD cHuRcH aNyMoRe??? lmao shut up.

  • eldoom@lemmy.ml
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    8 months ago

    Just sitting and having a casual lunch with my dad at work. Sack lunches that my mom had made us! When he nonchalantly tells me that women aren’t people and only exist for men’s enjoyment. I basically completely froze out of shock as he spends the next half hour trying to use excerpts from the Bible to prove his point.

    I haven’t had a conversation with him since and that was nearly 20 years ago. Also realized that Christianity is not something I want to be associated with.

    Funny thing is that he used to be adamant that god uses Parkinson’s to punish only the worst sinners and he’s got it now… Apparently there was some engine cleaning solvent my mom desperately tried to get him to stop using? The government banned it because it was giving people Parkinson’s so he stocked up on it to prove my mom wrong…

        • SharkEatingBreakfast@sopuli.xyz
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          8 months ago

          It’s okay.

          Really messed me up, tbh. Told that my purpose as a woman was to get married and “please my husband”, no matter what.

          As a teen, my desire to like boys never manifested. My youth pastor would preach about how women were princesses whose desire was to be saved by a knight, and men were knights seeking adventure. I always wanted the adventure, and I was completely ostracized for it.

          Imagine being told that your purpose is to be loved, then realizing that your true self is something nobody will ever love.

          It’s disturbing, and I was severely depressed throughout my entire young & teenage years.

          (it got much worse, but I don’t want to go over that. Just know that I escaped that shit eventually.)

          • Enkrod@feddit.org
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            8 months ago

            Thanks for letting us know that you escaped.

            And just so you know: I love my girlfriend, because she is the adventurer between us. She climbs mountains and explores exotic countries, she’s rugged and confident and the coolest person I know. She is my knight and although I’m no princess, she is very much loved for wanting adventure.

  • bizarroland@fedia.io
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    8 months ago

    The day my niece was born, my mom had asked me to wake her up so that she could be there after the birth.

    Apparently, me actually doing what she asked me to do turned out to be a grave insult.

    She ended up yelling and screaming at me, which triggered me, so I started yelling and screaming at her, and then she hit me with the only thing she could think of to actually hurt me.

    See, from before I get into that, I’ve got to explain that from the time I was 15 until I graduated high school at 17, my mom and my stepdad essentially locked me in my room and only let me out for punishment, which was digging up stumps in the backyard or picking up a rock from one pile and hauling it to another pile, picking up a different rock from that pile, hauling that one to the third pile, back and forth. for eight to ten hours a day, And for going to school, just enough to prevent CPS from being called on them.

    There was also a healthy dose of corporal punishment on top of that, being beaten for half an hour or longer for the smallest infraction.

    It really messed with my head because I honestly thought like at some point they would come to their senses and realize how absurd the entire thing was and apologize and they never fucking did.

    Anyway, now that we’ve got the groundwork in place, my mom decided she would say the thing that she could think of to hurt me, which was to tell me that her mother, my evil grandmother, had convinced her to do all of those things because otherwise no one would ever love me.

    And why is it that otherwise no one would ever love me?

    because I’m not white

    My mom had shamed the entire family by marrying a Native American and giving birth to his child, And my grandmother, who is evil for multiple reasons, and I’ll be glad to go into those, cause may she rot in piss, was a terrible person, had decided that the only way to cleanse the family of the stain of my existence was to psychologically induce my own mother into tormenting me in every single possible way she could.

    And so every single time I think about all the opportunities I missed out on and all the times my mom wasn’t there for me and all of the times that I was neglected and abused throughout my entire childhood, it all rolls back to my grandmother being a racist cunt, and my mother somehow not realizing that for what it was, and just being a good little flying monkey and doing whatever her mother told her to do with her own fucking child.

    So yeah, I was abused because my grandmother is racist, and I didn’t find out about that until I was 23 years old.

  • Waldelfe@feddit.org
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    8 months ago

    While writing my master thesis my professor suddenly left the university. Noone ever really knew why and there was no official statement other than a short sentence on the website that Prof. XYZ has left the department. My master thesis was on hold while I had to find a new professor. My mother, who has always accused me of being lazy and lying, insisted that it was all a lie. When I pointed out the news on the university website, she said: “I don’t know how you hacked the website and got it to display your lies, but I’m not falling for your deceit.” I am not a computer science major, I studied linguistics.

      • Waldelfe@feddit.org
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        8 months ago

        Well, according to her, university degrees are all worthless nowadays and “a masters is at a level a high school degree used to be at”. She also told me my As were worthless because “everybody gets an A nowadays just for showing up to class”.

          • Waldelfe@feddit.org
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            7 months ago

            Nope. I’ve been no contact for years, but when I still had contact, she just kept moving the goalpost. When I had good grades in school: They don’t mean anything, only the grades for Abitur (A-Levels) count. When I had good grades in Abitur: It means nothing, noone will ever ask for your Abitur grades again. Only the university degree counts. When I had my bachelors: Bachelor is worthless, only the master is a REAL degree. When I had my master degree: The master degree is worthless… And that’s the point where I cut contact with her.

    • Kazumara@discuss.tchncs.de
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      8 months ago

      I am not a computer science major, I studied linguistics.

      We’re not falling for your deceit, Noam Chomsky. You probably used some context-free grammar to hack the website.

  • grasshopper_mouse@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    When I was little, I did something bad (I don’t even remember what it was), and my mom got angry with me about it, and I was already crying, and I asked her “Do you still love me?” and she said “I don’t know”, and that shit has stuck with me forever and I’m sure contributes to the fact that I don’t truly trust anyone. If I brought it up to her now, she’d 100% deny it.

  • I went on a trip to another country. Unfortunately, I had an accident (involving a fucking hurricane) that almost killed me.I had insurance so they covered all the medical expenses, including tickets and accomdations for one of my parents (aka: one of them could come free of charge). They decided that it was a good opportunity to visit the country since one was coming “for free” and they only had to pay for the other one.

    Years later, my father told me that they are still paying the debt for the money they spent “because of me” when I had that accident so it was my fault they were in debt.

    • Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org
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      8 months ago

      So just to reiterate: What they’re paying off is literally just one of their vacation bills? I mean this would be an odd accusation even if it included other expenses but like… Huh?!

      • Apparently, going from europe to america buying the ticket at last minute is very expensive, they also had to add the stay in the hotel for one of them. For what he said, he spent around 9k euro on that trip (odd, i paid around 1500 for two people). Still, he threw that to me to make me feel guilty of their shitty spending habits. It was some years ago, when our relationship was already ice cold.

        They both are shitty parents and now they wonder why I don’t talk to them.

          • AbsolutelyNotAVelociraptor@sh.itjust.works
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            8 months ago

            Yeah they… are not good parents. They always were more interested in drinking than in growing their kids. And they both try to make you feel miserable because they now have understood that they lost their children due to their own selfishness and ego.

            When he tried to make me feel bad for almost dying in another country, it was the thing that snapped and made me cut the already thin ties completely.

            • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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              8 months ago

              Even if you hadn’t had insurance and they didn’t take a vacation, but one of them visited you to make sure their kid was treated well, that’s a fucking insane thing to say.