I like to think I’m a tech savvy parent and the amount of tooth gnashing to setup and maintain child accounts is incredible. I’m convinced the foxes guarding the henhouse are using dark patterns to make parents give up.

Why can’t I just get a notification on my phone saying “Hey, kiddo wants to have screen time. Approve?”

Hell, I’d love a notification saying “Kiddo started watching Mr. Blah.” If I got the notification and I didn’t want them watching that, I could block the video, or creator with a click. WHY ARE WE NOT AT THIS LEVEL OF CONVENIENCE?

A LOT of these concerns would go away if phones/tablets/tv’s had these simple controls. Move those privacy controls into the home and MAKE them so easy a neanderthal could operate them.

If I have to *.newsocialbook.com into my router, you can bet your damn ass that “LiveLaughLoveMom<3” is going to keep demanding that someone else do it for her.

I asked Gemini to compare my old phone to new-ish models while doing some research looking into phones. And I quote: “The [redacted] is a dinosaur. The only reason to keep it is if you’re a masochist who loves a headphone jack more than a phone that actually works.”

Yeah, fuck LLM’s. This phone is perfectly cromulent. It pissed me off so much I decided to not buy a new phone that day.

I don’t know about the rest but we gotta rename Uranus so people stop making juvenile jokes. I propose Urectum.