I live rurally (no Starbucks), but recently had to catch a train from Edinburgh for the second leg of a family holiday. It was delayed by an hour and was raining, so we went into the nearby Starbucks. 2 small hot chocolates for the kids and 1 coffee for my wife and I was down £23. I was caught in the slipstream and stressed so didn’t have time to process how much this would cost. We could have got a bag of snacks and drinks for the journey for half that. Robbing bastards.
Good for you (genuinely). Some folk absolutely should never touch booze. Alcoholism is hell, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
But my God, Lemmy is so puritanical these days. I’m 50, an ex-smoker, and I still enjoy the occasional drink. There’s a massive middle ground for most people.
Countless people have a normal relationship with alcohol. Personally, I have met some amazing folk and had wonderful experiences where drink has played a part.
I’m sure many of you are poised to jump in with the health risks, but honestly, don’t bother. It’s been part of enlightened societies for millennia. You can keep your few extra years at the end of a life of joyless macro-nutritional slavery. I’ll have a beer.
The assertion that women can’t even walk down the street without thinking that a man they pass might suddenly rape them is an extraordinary generalisation. Of course, women have legitimate reasons to be conscious of their personal safety, and sexual violence is a serious problem. But there’s a difference between acknowledging that reality and suggesting that women live in a constant state of fear whenever they leave the house. You’re presenting an extreme scenario as though it’s the universal female experience.
And the suggestion that your life is 20 times easier simply because you’re a straight white man is equally hyperbolic. Privilege isn’t a mathematical equation, and disadvantage isn’t experienced exclusively by women or ethnic minorities. Male suicide rates, loneliness, social isolation and the difficulties many men face in forming meaningful relationships are serious issues too. Men can experience profound disadvantage, vulnerability and suffering. Those things don’t disappear because they happen to be white.
None of this is to deny that women experience sexual violence, that racism exists, or that certain groups face systemic disadvantages. They do, and acknowledging those realities matters. But recognising one group’s difficulties shouldn’t require exaggerating them, diminishing another group’s struggles, or engaging in a competition over who has the hardest existence.
I also find the self-flagellation rather tiresome. You aren’t personally responsible for every terrible thing committed by another man who happens to share your skin colour. You don’t need to feel guilty for existing, nor do you need to apologise for advantages you didn’t consciously create. What you can do is recognise them, avoid dismissing other people’s experiences, and treat people as individuals.
And perhaps most importantly, stop confusing having privilege in certain respects with having an easy life. Struggling to pay your rent is a genuine hardship. Male loneliness and mental health are genuine problems. You can acknowledge those things while still recognising that other people face obstacles you don’t.
The answer isn’t to stay in your apartment. It’s to stop treating social inequality as either a reason for personal guilt or a competition in comparative misery.
So I was right to move to Surfshark?
Got a cheap deal on SurfShark, so moved to them from ExpressVPN. Both worked great, got good reviews etc. Happy to be re-assess if anyone has information to the contrary, or tells me they’re affiliated with the clan or something, but so far so good.
I’ve always thought Lemmy-folk were pretty progressive and attuned to untrue news narratives, but the number of people I’ve met here who think the UK is a tyrannical hellscape, overrun by immigrants where people have zero freedom and much of the country has ‘no go’ areas for white Christians genuinely surprised me. But hey, what do I know, I’ve only lived in the UK for 49 years.
The alcohol enabled the socialising. I feel many of you equate a few relaxing beers with friends with necking a bottle bottle of vodka by yourself just to keep the shotgun from your mouth. I was a nervous, anxious and low-confidence teen. That melted away after a couple of beers and introduced me to a life I wouldn’t have had on my own steam.
Well I’m 49 and was healthy at my last medical, so here’s hoping.
I have friends who have found it incredibly detrimental to their lives, so absolutely not recommended for all by any means.
Mentally it’s improved my life immeasurably. It took my out of my teenage shell, helped me socialise, introduced me to countless new experiences and people.
I’m lucky in that it hasn’t been problematic for me. Yes, it’s bad for you physically. A lot of things are. But I’d rather have it in my life than without.
That’s just my lived experience and I’d in no way refute the science. But I’d push back a little on the somewhat puritanical Alcohol = bad that many here sometines sanctimonious indulge in.
Beer. Genuinely. Drinks with friends (not daily or problematical) is, in my opinion, the absolute spice of life. It’s not for everyone and the downsides are well documented and undeniable, but it’s always worked for me.
Probably The Winchester.