If you do this, please keep an eye on how that individual person is reacting. Some people will love this and think you’re a wonderful, friendly person. Other people will be made incredibly uncomfortable. Both are valid responses.

I am personally in the latter camp. I’m autistic, I find eye contact difficult. If you’re being quite insistent about it, I will find it aggressive. As for the smiling, I am immediately distrustful of anyone giving me a giant smile while talking to me for the first time. A little smile is normal, but if you have a massive grin without any observable cause, my assumption is that you are trying to corner me into something. Maybe I’m just too cynical or damaged in some way, but this just sets off my alarm bells.

A few, it was just like any weekend day except I couldn’t go shopping.

Christmas doesn’t have any significance to me or my mother, so we don’t go out of our way to spend time together. In fact she tends to gleefully pick up extra hours at work because they pay her more. If I’m single or my partner is unavailable this results in me spending Christmas alone, which I honestly enjoy. If I’m in a relationship, I usually get sucked into whatever Christmas shenanigans my partner’s family gets up to.

I’ve been drawing ever since I can remember. There are parts of the process I enjoy and find satisfaction in, and other parts that can just be a chore. The feeling tends to vary with time as well. Some days I enjoy drawing/painting, and other days it feels like I’m only doing it because it’s what’s expected of me.

A mid-30s from New Zealand here. Out of my friends and family living in the country that I still keep in touch with, I can only think of 2 households that don’t currently own their home.

One of them was pretty undecided for a long time about where he wants to live and what career to pursue, so didn’t really settle down anywhere. He’s in a serious relationship now though so that might change.

The other one is my brother-in-law and his partner. They’re planning on purchasing a house at some point but it’s not a priority for them - they’re actually renting out our first house from us so they don’t need to worry about getting kicked out without warning or dealing with unpleasant landlords or any of those usual things. When they leave, we plan on selling the house instead of renting it out again. We only kept it to make sure they had a safe space to be themselves.

Out of the homeowners, there’s a quite a mixture of people. Some have come from privilege and got handed money from their parents. Others grew up in a lower socio-economic group and earned all of the initial deposit themselves. One guy has a single dad that’s never owned his own home and has relied on disability income for most of his adult life. My friend had a lot of trouble finishing his university degree and finding work, it was years before he landed his current job at a small store. They’re living together in a house he owns himself now, I thought that was pretty sweet.

New Zealand has had a housing problem problem for a while now, so whenever I think of owning/renting in general it’s usually with negative feelings and frustration. Thanks for giving me this moment to reflect on a more personal level, I think my friends are doing great.