This past week, someone thought I was still in high school (sometimes known as secondary school), but I’m actually at least ten years older.
I don’t care what they think since they are still in high school themselves, but I’m sure other people have thought I was that young (but didn’t say it out loud).
Other than growing a beard, what else can I (and other men) do to make ourselves (at least facially) look older?
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Youth is wasted on the young.
Life isn’t a race. Hold onto your youth and don’t peak early, stay whimsical and have fun
Once you’re actually old, you’ll be glad that it’s at least a new experience
Wear new balance shoes, or sandals with socks.
Look “professional” tends to help. It’s an overton window some, you’ll want to find the most professional you can look for what your face and body type. But you are essentially try to look like you are in a later stage in your career which people, because it takes time, associate with older people.
Adding some muscle mass can help (you know towards dad bod no need for body builder shenanigans).
Some old guy tricks are wearing smart pragmatic clothing, but are kind of commiting to the bit of being comfortable being an adult. So suspenders/belts to keep your pants up, fanny packs to store stuff you need on the go (medical kit, snacks), somewhere to have a pen, a utility knife, etc. Glasses if you need them. Hats that keep the weather off of you appropriate to your region. Etc
Caring about how old people are or look is a young person’s game.
When you go “What? Of course I know today is Tuesday… Oh yeah you’re right, it is my birthday. Nah, just an early night for me.”, no one will think you’re a high schooler.
But style choices, posture, glasses and other accessories can make a difference as well.
Or just take thinning shears to your temples and crown, and go for a balding look.
It’s all about what you wear.
White New Balance 608s, jorts, and a graphic tee about sarcasm or puns. Make sure your 608s are stained a little green from mowing the lawn.
Route every conversation back to your lawn, lawnmowers, or the Traeger/Blackstone you want to buy when your wife let’s you.
Literally that easy.
Spend long hours under the scorching sun with no protection. The irreversible damage caused by UV light will make your skin look significantly older. Bonus points for not using sunglasses, so your vision can deteriorate faster too.
I don’t think I need to say this, but just in case: do not actually do that.
Also, I too used to think “I can’t grow a beard” due to thin and not very dense facial hair, but if you say “screw it” and do it anyway, it eventually works out (unless your reason is different). It’ll look like absolute shit for a while, but once the slower growing areas catch up, it’s not that bad.
start smoking and drinking, cut back on sleep and find an unfulfilling stressful and thankless job that also underpays. throw in some women/partner/spouse that treat you like shit to really speed this up.
Just get a bad wife, won’t even have to do anything yourself
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Tuck your t-shirt into your jeans
Have kids. The people with kids who are ten years younger than me look twenty years older than me.
I used to have 3 grey hairs on my beard. Now she’s 3 and it’s all fucking grey.
“Well you’re probably just naturally greying anyway”
No. I’m greying because every visit to the toilet is an hourlong negotiation that didn’t have to happen.
Just enjoy it while it lasts. People have consistently estimated me 10 years younger than my real age for decades. Well, until now, since I’m getting some grey hairs.
A lot is how you dress and act. Act with authority, wear professional type clothes.
Hang on to that shit as long as you can.
I also thought my facial hair was shit until I let it grow and it was pretty okay, and people told me I look 30 whereas before I looked around 20. Never went back to clean shaven ever. My moustache and beard are patchy as fuck but still better than looking like a fucking toddler
