fuck I’m not in the right headspace when I’m asking this, unresolved trauma. Now I’m repeating in my head “love them more than my mental illnesses”.

I wanted to warn an organization i cared about my past and that manipulation comes naturally to me to the point where I don’t notice after the fact. I legit want see them succeeded and stand in blind solidarity.

I have reached out someone in the organization about my issues. I’m hoping they respond.

  • melsaskca@lemmy.ca
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    3 months ago

    Being aware of your unwanted behaviour is the first step towards modifying it. Good luck!

  • Fizz@lemmy.nz
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    3 months ago

    Probably a question that should be discussed with a therapist. I dont think people here can give a good answer as we lack to much context.

    • AskewLord@piefed.social
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      3 months ago

      yes, but this is also a straight up troll.

      legit narcissists don’t think they are manipulating people, or being narcissists. they see their behavior as ‘natural’. they also don’t talk about their trauma.

      • BooBees@fedinsfw.app
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        3 months ago

        There’s plenty of narcissists that know they’re narcissists, and there’s therapy tools to help them participate in the world in a more healthy manner, but as you sorta indicated, it’s very rare any want to, and even more rare than any actively go down that path, so seeing someone speaking as if they’re struggling with it internally without seeing any sign of having already developed those tools makes it highly unlikely they’re legit. Probably just regular old mental illness of some sort, maybe attention seeking coupled with drug use and emotional instability. Wonder if they’re single, that’s right up my alley.

      • rhombus@sh.itjust.works
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        3 months ago

        Weird how often I see this take. Narcissism is really Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and it is possible for someone with NPD to recognize they have it and want to change. Not super common, but it is possible.

        • bedwyr@piefed.ca
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          3 months ago

          Sure they will want to change, but they can’t, and won’t. Narcissists are the worst.

        • Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          “weird how often I see people assuming people with NPD are going to continue to exhibit traits of NPD”

        • AskewLord@piefed.social
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          3 months ago

          is possible for someone with NPD to recognize they have it and want to change.

          at this point they are ceased being a narcissist.

          • solidheron@sh.itjust.worksOP
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            3 months ago

            Yeah your sentence has two verbs in the same sentence. You should say “they are being” or “they ceased being”.

            Buuuuut I don’t use basic communication errors to find mentally ill people

  • Malyca@lemmy.zip
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    3 months ago

    I just want to say that this level of self reflection is admirable given your challenges. Tell people you trust or people that need to know only. As far as stigma goes, nobody has it worse.

    • solidheron@sh.itjust.worksOP
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      3 months ago

      until you realize trump is president, but the behavior is permissible just not labeling yourself as a narcissist. society does have rules that only exist to isolate us and hostility towards those that are mentally ill is one of them

  • jenesaisquoi@feddit.org
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    3 months ago

    I assume you’re asking this because you’d like to reduce the impact of that kind of behaviour.

    If that is your goal, then it would be best attained by going to psychotherapy. NCD/ASPD cannot be healed, but it can be treated and its effects greatly reduced, assuming you’re willing to put in the work.

  • Strider@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Are you really narcissistic or did someone just say you are (rhetorical question for yourself, not the internet)?

    If you really are, congratulations, knowing and admitting is a huge thing!

    Listen to the other advice, ask a professional.

    • solidheron@sh.itjust.worksOP
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      3 months ago

      I feel like you’re the first to sincerely ask that. I can answer that I just have a trigger warning about it. Even though the other threads hint to how I know outside of a professional diagnosis

      • Strider@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        It’s a neurodivergent thing, I often ask and say things outside of social habits. Also I don’t need the answer nor does it mean anything to me to be blunt, uh, again.

        • solidheron@sh.itjust.worksOP
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          3 months ago

          Okay I got ya. Nah I have an hole issue with communication. I don’t want problems to get overlooked or needless mistakes to be made.

          Probably neurodivergent myself since I can’t quite connect to another person

      • Rhoeri@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        I mean, the logic behind the answer is right there in the question itself. If you’re trying to be honest person because you respect this place, and it’s people, which it seems you are-

        Telling them it’s in your nature to deceive is definitely a way to protect them. Even if it’s from you yourself.

    • CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org
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      3 months ago

      Yeah, something else seems to be going on. A narcissist doesn’t consider warning people about themselves.

      • Zozano@aussie.zone
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        3 months ago

        I was gonna say something like this.

        Narcissists have a very hard time accepting they’re narcissists.

        If you think “hmm, I might be a narcissist” you’re almost certainly not.

        But you might be a hypochondriac or have Munchausens

        • CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org
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          3 months ago

          Or they hear about narcissism and think it sounds like a good thing, which is apparently a pretty common reaction.