• velma@sh.itjust.works
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    3 months ago

    A particular man’s penis. I realized too late that he didn’t routinely clean under his foreskin.

  • Boiglenoight@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    As a kid I took a swig off my Mom’s Coca Cola. She had been using the can as an ash tray. Puked for five mins and can recall that taste in a second as an adult.

  • 58008@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    My girlfriend-at-the-time’s dirty, dirty ass. Thought it would be like in my fantasies, where it tastes like candyfloss and smells like a Yankee candle. Nope. Shit. Just shit.

    If you’re curious, shit tastes exactly as it smells. I wish I didn’t know that. Although I’m happy that now you, too, know that.

    And she had the nerve to dump me later. I deserve a Nobel peace prize for not recoiling in horror and instead just powering through in silence like a fucking GENTLEMAN.

    On the bright side, it became a great way to ensure future partners were cognisant of the issue. I’d drop it into the usual “what was your ex like?” gossip sessions that come with new relationships. It’s like saying “please wash your various holes if I’m gonna go rooting around in them like an ant-fiending aardvark” without actually saying it. A cautionary fable from days of yore to guide the next generation.

    P.S. I’m still pro-anilingus. Just… clean the fuckin’ thing first. I don’t need to be picking dingleberries from between my teeth, thanks.

  • CelloMike@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    An oyster

    The town I grew up in is famous for them, we even learned about them in school but I’d never tried one

    Finally decided to just before I moved away for university and eugh, salty mucus-y blob, had to spit it out again, poor lil guy

  • Widdershins@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Maggots. I’ve been chasing the high ever since. They were hiding in a pineapple flavored Swiss roll. I thought the maggots were coconut flakes at first. Pina colada is a good flavor. The maggots popping like boba didn’t set any alarm bells off. It was better than the usual coconut crunch. The maggots wriggling against my gums and tongue didn’t set any alarm bells off. It was the only time I ever chewed something that felt carbonated. The lone maggot crawling across my couch away from certain doom finally clued me in. Half of his platoon just got eaten and the other half was without a doubt up next.

    The same thing happened to my mom at some point when she was a kid. For her it was an Almond Joy or Mounds, which let the maggots blend in even better. Is it a once in a lifetime thing everybody experiences or a generational curse? I feel cursed with the knowledge that maggots in the right context taste like the fuckin’ future.

  • Tja@programming.dev
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    3 months ago

    I dint know if the most disgusting, but the biggest delta between expectation and reality was root beer.

    Expected something vanilly or maybe gingery, got mouthwash. I genuinely spit the first sip.

    • SupraMario@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Make sure root beer is ice cold, like nearly frozen. Room temp (warm) root beer can have a cough syrup flavor to some people.

      Also there are a TON of different types of root beer. Some are better than others. I’m a 1919 and Triple XXX fan. Sprecher is also good, but the others are better, just sprechers is easier to get.

      • Bytemeister@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Warm root beer is an entirely different drink. Still good IMO, the taste is softer and more drawn out. Cold rootbeer is crisper with a cleaner (by comparison) finish.

    • AFK BRB Chocolate (CA version)@lemmy.ca
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      3 months ago

      Two things could hardly be more different than root beer and mouth wash. To be fair, there are a lot of different varieties of root beer - some with a heavy licorice flavor, others stronger vanilla or whatever, but they’re all sweet.

      As someone else suggested, maybe you got a strong ginger beer? Those can be pretty spicy.

      • Tja@programming.dev
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        3 months ago

        Nope, A&W root beer. Maybe a have some weird gene mutation like some people have one that makes cilantro taste like soap. I bought a can and even got a root beer float. Still mouthwash (not the ice cream part).

  • k0e3@lemmy.ca
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    3 months ago

    This thread’s got me curious about what my dick would taste like.

  • Hawke@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Slug.

    When I was small I left my kazoo outside in the yard, and then when I went to play it the next day, I learned the hard way what slugs taste like.

    They’re bitter.

    • CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org
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      3 months ago

      I got a bag of those once when I was a kid. They were totally dried, but in they end it was just a bland, slightly salty way to jam shells between my teeth. 2.5/10, probably worse with rice.

      It’s possible I was actually supposed to soak them first.

  • Chaunticleer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 months ago

    I got some of that pre period goop in me once. I would say that turnabout was fair play for a dude but I don’t like blowies so I just got gooped for nuthin

    Yeah I fuckin swallowed it, I’m not bitch made

  • CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org
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    3 months ago

    Ugh. Once when I was a kid I got the idea in my head to stick my face in between the couch cushoins and inhale hard. I still can kinda see the cursed salad I was spitting out for a while.

  • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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    3 months ago

    I didn’t put it there but when I was in college sharing an apartment with my brother and his wife they got a dog and when they got it home the instant it got through the door it beelined for my lap and slipped it’s tongue ALL the way along the roof of my mouth. Decades ago and I can still feel it.

  • 9point6@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Mouldy yoghurt

    This was something like 16-17 years ago now so it’s clearly left a mark

    It was about 2-3am, I lived on the ground floor of a student house and I wanted a snack. Remembering I had bought some yoghurts a day or two before I figured that’s what I was going for.

    Now I’m not really sure what happened, if I picked up an old one I’d not noticed or it was just bad from the shop, but it didn’t notice until after I’d taken the first mouthful.

    Needless to say it tasted genuinely awful and put me off yoghurt in general for a good while